Day 980

It's decided: we'll never take our Lizard out into big groups of people again.

Day 979

Pride and warm dizzied as the Lizard ate her first official attempt at real food with enthusiasm. And then amusement at her chagrin at being confronted with plain old breast milk. Her expression clearly said: "Hey! Where the bananas at?!"

Day 978

I agree, little Lizard. People are exhausting.

Day 977

The day the baby pukes when you kiss her is a good day for Thursday to unexpectedly become your Friday.

Day 976

It is disconcerting having a very cheerful baby who won't sleep.

Day 975 (oops)

Discovering the Lizard likes sunshine as much as her parents; enjoying the snuggliness of a sweet little puppy who isn't really a puppy anymore; luxuriating in leek and mushroom pie and Black Forest booze cake; spanking death with my wonderful husband. 

Day 972

Husband pointed this out, but I am having trouble believing it; the Lizard weighs more than the dog.

Day 971

TIL it is possible to walk into a ceiling. The Lizard learned how to pee very thoroughly all over her change table while her mommy is stunned from walking into a ceiling.

Day 970

That horrible moment of suspense after a loud noise while you wait to hear if the baby woke up...

Day 969

That wonderful thing where the baby is reasonably good at going to bed, and you get to regularly hang out with your husband again. And spank death.

Day 968

I can adult and so can you!

Day 967

The babies are still recovering from yesterday's ordeal. The Lizard wants to sleep a lot, and the puppy MUST CUDDLE ALL OF THE THINGS.

Day 966

The Lizard has had her first overnight trip.  It's the May long weekend and there is a massive rain/ice/snow/wind storm going on. The power went out with no sign of coming back on in the near future, resulting in a harrowing drive back to the city.

I'm not sure if that was the message the universe intended to send, but it sure feels like we should never leave the house again.

Day 965

The Lizard's first walk-in visit, first national park, and first sleeping in a travel bed. 

Too much excitement for mums.

Day 964

Sometimes caution pays.

Day 963

When your baby's face lights up every time she sees you, it can make even the day the baby pukes on your face the best day of the week.

Day 962

Life would be much more pleasant if babies could only leak one bodily fluid on you per day.

Day 961

Another day, another ten games of 'Why Is ______ Wet?'

Day 960

Some days(/hours/minutes) you wonder why everyone isn't always having babies since they are so tiny and wonderful and lovely.

And then other times you wonder how you managed to get Stockholm Syndrome.

Day 959

You know you've stayed up way too late when the dog puts himself to bed.

Also, you get a new appreciation for Mother's Day and Father's Day when you start to realize all the crap parents put up with.

Day 958 (so belated)

Sometimes I think I have the sweetest, smiliest baby in the world... And then the middle of the night happens.

Day 957

It is sobering to realize that you are so tired that you would refuse to hold someone else's baby, but you are carrying yours up and down stairs and bench pressing her to make her giggle. 

Tell me again about how you're soooo tired from having to stay up late to write a paper.

Day 956

Your sense of humour changes when you have a baby. Luckily, your spouse is just as sleep-deprived.

Day 955

Babies have a remarkable quantity of evil and sleeplessness per square inch.

Day 954

The Lizard has now watched her first concession speech, thanks to her flabbergasted mother.

Day 953

Baby monitor conundrums:

Is she coughing for real, or for attention?

Is the yelling because she's mad that you've put her to bed at her bedtime when she's tired, or because she rolled over, or because she rolled over and got her arm stuck between crib bars, or because she tangled her legs up in her blanket and can't roll over?

Day 952

The Lizard believes in being fashionably late. She ensures this by puking and/or pooping right before we leave the house to get somewhere at a specific time.

Day 951

If you want to feel absurdly pleased with yourself for accomplishing ordinary tasks, get a baby and a puppy.

Day 950 (belated)

The Lizard learns to roll both ways; parenting difficulty level increases.