Day 3565

 Who will fall asleep first? The recuperating hot water bottle or the lap it’s lying in?

Day 3564

 Despite the best efforts of one of our banshees, the house is too quiet without our Bertram.

Day 3563

The tree has benefits that outweigh its stick production.

The tree has benefits that outweigh its stick production.

The tree has benefits that outweigh its stick production.

Day 3562

 When I am big and you are little; when I am a teddy and teddy is a person…

Day 3561

 She couldn’t possibly end up more three than she has been two.

Right?

Day 3560

 Not even pretending that we’re getting out the card game to play with the kid anymore…

Day 3559

 I cannot, in good conscience, recommend overtired children.

Day 3558

 I was not expecting Hot Dog Week to contain no hot dogs.

I did step food inside a library for the first time in forever, so that’s a thing.

Day 3557

 No, I don’t want to take a picture of your booger.

Day 3556

 A stream of tugboats

Day 3555

 It makes you feel his imagination must have come to life: how big were those damn mosquitoes?!

Day 3554

 When the heat gives a warning,

A/C after morning.

Day 3553

 Why not bring an overtired two year old through the ominous marsh?

Day 3552

 Banana has pretty harsh criticism for places that aren’t our house.

Day 3551

 I already get the feeling that Banana will be extra, no matter what age she is. 

Day 3550

 Now our lives will be filled with squares. Perfection.

Day 3549

 Do people last longer than lightbulbs?

Day 3548

 Don’t buy old houses if you like new mattresses.

Day 3547

 The spoons were much more expensive than anticipated.

Day 3546

 Dear Banana,

We are well aware you never want to sleep. We know. We get it. We don’t like going to sleep either.

But someday you will figure out that you really like having had a good sleep.

Please figure it out soon.

Love, 

Your Mother

Day 3545

 I am somewhat annoyed to discover that becoming a flower mom involves feeling protective of the flowers and feeling the need to keep an eye on them.

Day 3544

 It’s official, I’m a mom now. I planted a flower bed.

Day 3543

 Planting trees is very satisfying.

Day 3542

 Have tree, will travel.

Day 3541

 You can even lure little Banana out of the cupboard and make with the promise of a walk.

Day 3540

That feeling when you do extra gardening to distract the kids from the gardening that actually needs to get done.

Day 3539

In which Banana discovered playgrounds and our boy discovered house parties. 

Probably ill omens for the future on both counts.

Day 3538

 For the first (and probably only) time in my life, contemplating buying a coin to commemorate not getting a job.

Day 3537

 Trying to make career decisions feels like walking around an Escher house.

Day 3536

It is possible to forget that you actually have to teach children how to throw and catch balls.

You remember when you try to throw and catch balls with your child. And go: “Oh. Wow. Oh no. Okay, so…”