Day 3991

 Are you doing it wrong or right if your four year old wants her bedtime story to be the list in the atlas of the ten biggest islands in the world?

Day 3990

There is probably a good reason that the best audience for dad jokes is a very tired audience.

Or people under four feet.

Day 3989

I was not expecting to be thankful for my DOS skills at this phase in my life, but here we are.

Day 3988

 It’s not a sick day, it’s a whinge day.

Day 3987

 When you can take the crash but not the suggestion that you might have acted slightly differently to avoid the crash…

Day 3986

 “How do otters be rough with people?”

Is not exactly the bedtime discussion you want to have with a sleepy four year old.

Day 3985

 Marsupio is an excellent name that clearly needs to be used somehow. Either by acquiring even more plushie, or by renaming all the characters in Shakespearean’s famous play Wallaroo & Bandicoot.

Day 3984

 I do want go time out.

Day 3983

 The pit has been filled and we didn’t lose any mammals!

Day 3982

 Surprise aqueducts are not my favourite.

Neither are burnt hats.

Day 3981

 Inside circles, outside circles.

Day 3980

 What does it mean if a city sows its wild oats?!

Day 3979

 When your kid asks to consult the atlas and casually uses fractions, you know you’re raising the right kind of weirdo.

Day 3978

Today I learned jackhammers are very heavy. 

I also learned that I should not take the four year old through goose poop alley if I want to walk at an almost reasonable speed.

Day 3977

 Bigger circles to walk in.

Day 3976

 Would not recommend needing foundation work.

Day 3975

 The lawn feels even bigger when there’s a teary-eyed kid standing at the window watching you mow and waiting for you to let her out.

Day 3974

 In which the children discover that adult parties are boring (Lizard says “I let you talk for a while already!”), but that they make adults relax their supervision.

Day 3973

 RAMPAGE!

Day 3972

 Hello Bookstore, my old friend. 

Day 3971

 Yes child, I definitely looked dismayed because I thought the eyeballs and spiders you put in your Halloween slime were real eyeballs and spiders.

Day 3970

 A study in contrasts

Day 3969

 It’s hard to consider a different house seriously on a day that you see two fawns, a doe, and a stag from your front window.

Day 3968

 Some days require more will power than others.

Day 3967

 If you’re going to bring your young children to the museum, probably don’t.

Or go to a very very very small museum.

A museum for ants, perhaps.

Day 3966

 Turns out if you buy your children slippers in August because they are on sale, they will want to wear them in August.

And if you buy one pair that is much too big, they will bestow them upon you, and place them carefully beside your bed so that when you get up in the morning (still in August), you can put on your fuzzy fox slippers.

Day 3965

Spaghetti helps me feel better about my baby getting big.

Day 3964

 A sign it’s been a while since I last wore a skirt: the children were demanding to know why I was doing such a thing.

Day 3963

 That feeling when the four year old identifies the song by name after hearing the first chord…

Day 3962

 A small pool of glimmers of hope…

Day 3961

 Once upon a time, there was a Princess in a white dress with flowers on it, and her name was Cinderella. At night, she turned into a bear and roared all night and didn’t sleep at all.