Day 3718

 Just keep swimming.

Day 3717

You know you got a good one when your husband gets you an excel mug.

It’s Excellent.

See what I did there?

Day 3716

 Watching someone engage critically with Air Bud is better than watching Air Bud. 

Also, just desserts. But too chilled for actual dessert.

Day 3715

 Three year olds can always be relied on to lovingly transmit their viral load to their parents.

Day 3714

 It’s always fun seeing the sick kid at daycare before your kid’s temperature abruptly spikes.

Day 3713

 It is nice to know (somewhat belatedly) that we got books from a book fairy.

Day 3712

 Probably best to take off winter coats before leading your herd of bookworms into a book fair.

Day 3711

 Does it still count as independence if you need someone to watch you being independent?

Day 3710

 If you want all your children to actually eat their dinner, make something new you assume at least one of them will refuse to eat…. And they will all eat it enthusiastically.

Because they are unpredictable little goblins carefully shredding sanity but by bit, like tiny tufts of cotton candy.

Day 3709

 Monday: the most reasonable night for CAH and scotch.

Day 3708

 When your kid makes baby name suggestions like Beehive, or Mommy, and you have to hide your face so she can’t tell your laughing your butt off… and then she grabs your head and says “Mommy! Pay attention!!”

Day 3707

 “Do all chickens have faginas?”

I wonder if he asks these questions at school.

Day 3706

 If all else is stupid, why not try differently shaped pizza?

Differently-Shaped Pizza: It’s Chinese Food!

Day 3705

 When do the less interesting times start?

Day 3704

 Among benefits companies should consider: letting employees go on leave so they can really delve into that new cookbook they just got.

Our video game or loom or Lego or attempt to visit national parks in all the provinces or whatever.

Day 3703

 This spaghetti looks suspiciously like pizza. We seem to have forgotten to cut the dough. And cooked it funny. And added entirely too much cheese and assorted garnishes. 

We should probably try again tomorrow.

Day 3702

 When your kid asks, at bedtime, what animal has a skull most like a human, and which is the most different, and whether a horse is closest or second closest or maybe third closest…maybe it shouldn’t be a surprise that he wants to stay up late talking about everything with his sister.

Day 3701

 Work travel in easy mode, engage!

Day 3700

 Parenting: it’s easy, y’all.

Day 3699

 I do not recommend necks.

Day 3698

 Some rules seem to be self evident until you have children run afoul of them.

No bikes in the bathroom. 

If you ralph in bed, don’t just go back to sleep.

Day 3697

 Realizing too late that I could have started learning R on talk like a pirate day.

Day 3696

 Sometimes happy little mistakes turn into Lego play dates.

Day 3695

 More clearing up about skeletons and mummies required. “Are some skeletons looking that way when they die?”

Skeletons don’t die. They are dead. They have missed the boat for looking.

Day 3694

 Another edition of ‘swap out a primary ingredient for the dinner you already started making!’

Is that a cooking show yet? Give the chefs a basket of ingredients, and after they’ve planned and started cooking, take away one of the ingredients. Give them limited options to substitute, and some of them are frozen solid.

And they have to placate a three year old. 

Day 3693

 Had biscuits, didn’t buy a house.

Day 3692

 It’s a nice change to be a casual observer of a dumpster fire at work.

Day 3691

 Is there anything more glorious than little goblin giggles?

Day 3690

 Subscribe to Goblin Girl’s Animal Facts.

Also her instructions for making breakfast.

Day 3689

 If you want to go for the quietest walk on a beautiful day, go out in the evening the day after Halloween.