Day 4082

 Do I have to correct the notion that the bathroom scale tells you how many baths and showers you’ve had?

Day 4081

 Indeed, why wouldn’t you want to be a sheep?

Because sheep can’t build Legos, even if they do save on coats.

Day 4080

 I was not intending to celebrate conjunctivitis all month. The children apparently had other ideas.

Day 4079

 Any day can feel like a holiday if you serve fizzy drink.

Day 4078

 When the children who have been bickering all evening comment about how weird it is that Tasmanian devils shriek at each other over food…

Day 4077

 Am I too old for a corningware cornflower tramp stamp?

Day 4076

 Have we considered that it may just be a simple case of demonic possession?

Day 4075

 Fish & Fish.

Day 4074

 Almost going to be in good time is still better than going to bed at bad time…

Day 4073

Screw the Problem of Evil, what about the Problem of Boogers?

Day 4072

 Okay, but how many plagues does it take to fulfill a curse?

Day 4071

 ‘A plague on both your houses’ is a pretty good curse.

Day 4070

 Our snuggler in chief is home at last!

Day 4069

You know a species is meant to be extinct when its digestive tract doesn’t match what it eats and there isn’t a word for a group of them.

Day 4068

 Thinking about meals I don’t have the energy to cook

Day 4067

 At least the four year old knows she shouldn’t lick people at daycare (she says “because there are sometimes sick people at daycare”)…

Day 4066

 I’m not sure whether it is good or bad to have someone with a lot of time on their hands to suggest recipes to. Yes, you make coq au vin and I’ll put a puffy pizza in the oven. You and my kids will be thrilled, I’m sure.

Day 4065

 Some days it is hard to appreciate the universe’s sense of humour.

Day 4064

 May the spirit of helpfulness prevail.

Day 4063

 Always check the library closures before you say the word ‘library’ out loud in front of children.

Day 4062

 I’ll follow Banana’s example and try more blankets. But probably not five of them.

Day 4061

 But have you tried having a huge tantrum over something unavoidable or pointless?

Day 4060

Little goblins sort of absorbing pedestrian etiquette is pretty amusing.

Day 4059

SPAGHETTI 

IS

BAAAAACK!!!!!

Day 4058

 Know where the mailbox is if you are planning to drag the kids to it on foot.

Day 4057

 If you buy animal reference books and have children, you are automatically subscribed to Animal Facts.

YOU CAN NEVER UNSUBSCRIBE 

Day 4056

 Someday all the LEGO will be sorted again…

Day 4055

 “Are mysteries real?”

You look at me like you expect a simple yes or no answer, but I suspect you’re just getting more adept at bedtime doorknob questions.

Day 4054

 When the kid gets so made he storms upstairs, curls up in bed and falls asleep, and then wakes up mad, and continues the rage-a-thon. 

This is not the kind of commitment to the bit that I’m a fan of.

Day 4053

On this cross quarter day, we celebrate the fact that Halloween is over and we can sit on our butts.